The day I sold my soul to sugar–and then broke up with it…

Back in my darkest days, I could binge, and I could binge real good.  My drug of choice was an Oreo cookie.  I always joked that they were like crack cocaine.  I realized that eating a whole section of Oreos at one time wasn’t good, but honestly and truly, it’s like I had no control over myself.  I know there are reports out there that sugar is addicting yet in my stubbornness, I think that there must be some sort of willpower out there that is attainable for me to develop that I can have my healthy body and still keep my Oreos.  After selling my soul to these brownies THAT INCLUDE OREOS, I realize this isn’t so.  There is no way that Oreos can live under the same roof with me without them being annihilated.  Oh and when someone tells me that they just don’t have a sweet tooth, why don’t you just pretend the very worst fate for them so I don’t have to type it all out.

This is how it came to be that I needed an Oreo intervention…

Friday night, I made the brownies you see above. I ate one.

Saturday, I think I had three brownies?  Yup, three.  I had one before my workout because, well sugar…it will give me energy.  And then yeah, two more throughout the day.  I probably would have had more but I didn’t want to have my kids ask where they all went and be embarrassed.  Now I just get to be embarrassed here with my confessions.

Sunday rolls around and my cold symptoms are the most severe they have been all weekend long, I have no energy, we skipped church, and all I could think about was cookies and anything with sugar.  Fortunately, we had nothing sweet left in the house as the kiddos polished off the Oreos on Saturday night.  (Now don’t lecture me about how I feed my family, or what is allowed in the house.  I’m working on that. Obviously.)

Sunday evening, after not moving my butt off the couch through multiple Netflixed episodes of "Touch”, it dawned on me how crappy I felt and I knew instantly it was because of the sugar.  It’s been nagging at me a lot lately.  I did extremely well on the Advocare cleanse challenge, and then I let sugar back in, thinking, “I gots this!”  It’s been downhill since.

Big announcement here….I’m quitting sugar.  What that looks like for me at this very moment is no desserts. I’m keeping my 1-2 pieces of fruit a day. I’m focusing on the white stuff at the moment.  You have been warned and feel free to steer clear of my while I go through withdrawals.  It probably won’t be pretty.

Doesn’t this sound like a fun challenge?  Who would like to join me?!?!

Baby Kale vs. Adult Kale

I’m having issues blogging again because I’m embarrassed that I flubbed up.  And by flubbed up, I mean, it’s not too bad but I have found myself self-soothing with food a lot more lately.  I really need to put into practice some different techniques for when the “going gets rough.”  Do you have some ideas or tricks?

I’m still using my Advocare products and in combination with eating healthy and on schedule (hypoglycemic here!), my cravings have severely diminished.  Speaking of low blood sugar though, you would think by now, I would have the hang of things and eating on a schedule.  Really easy to do at work!  On the weekends, oh my goodness!  I have found that setting alarms for when to eat next is what helps me best stay on track.

Oh and then take this evening…I get home from work.  I could eat, I’m hungry-ish, but the girls and I had a couple of errands to run.  So we get home at about 6:30pm and I’m famished!  I mean, shaking hungry….annnnnnnddddd, I dipped into the soup the kids were eating while my dinner was cooking.  I also dipped into the belated Valentine cookies I made for my hubs.  Shhh, don’t tell him!  I started to beat myself up, but I did eat really well at work today and even turned down a treat from the Dairy Queen run that my coworkers made. 

Note to self, don’t run errands after work unless you’ve eaten dinner.

Don’t let me stay away from blogging again so long.  Pester me on facebook, k?  Oh and share your tips for not self-soothing with food.  Pretty please.

Pretty sure it would be ok to eat Baby Kale when you’re stressed.  Jeune chou frise anyone?  My first time trying it today.  DeLICIOUS!  Though I don’t understand why it looks nothing like Adult Kale.

The coffee date that changed my life.

I met him for coffee so he would quit bugging me.  It was my oldest daughter’s birthday, but he was in town and I thought if I just met him in person on my lunch break, he would realize that we didn’t really click.  He was a goofball, always cracking jokes…I was more reserved and didn’t always get his jokes.  We met on Match.com and from the few dates I had been on, while free dinners were nice, and I was meeting nice men, there was just no spark with anyone.   I vividly remember the first time I saw him in person.  He was walking across the parking lot to come into the Starbucks where we were meeting.  He pushed the sleeves up on his light blue, Calvin Klein sweater and my heart skipped a beat.  Tall, dark, and handsome….and a man that knew how to dress?! (To this day, he spends more money on his clothes than I spend on mine.)

 

Six years ago, today, I met the love of my life.  God has been so good to us in so many ways and I continue to thank Him for bringing this handsome, lovable goofball into my life.  You truly do know that God has a sense of humor when He made us a couple.  We are such opposites and such a perfect match.  There are not enough mushy words in the dictionary for me to express my love for my husband.  There’s a flip side of course and boy do we get frustrated with each other!  I will just keep pursuing the opportunities to be the wife that he deserves.

And now….some photos…

Our recent trip to Bend, Oregon took us past these lovely “sisters.”

He indulged me in a portrait…which I thought was nice of him.  He supports the silly things I do, like stopping to take a picture of the fish bus.

My treat looks like a fly/alien

I’ve been rather quite on here the last couple of days.  I’m just plugging along with the week and looking forward to getting out of town this weekend with my valentine for our annual get-away to Bend, OR.  It’s close….it’s away from home, and best of all, they have a Trader Joes!!!!!

Strength Training

Workouts are going well but man are they tough!  This new phase of Jillian Michael’s Body Revolution…holy otter pops!  Lot’s of plyometrics and single leg squats with weights everywhere.  I have muscles hurting that have never hurt before.

Running

I’m running anywhere from 3-4 times a week right now.  My mileage is pretty low as I’m working through the Couch to 5k program.  I’ve mentioned that a couple of times right?  Especially if you follow me on Daily Mile or My Fitness Pal.  Yeah, so I’m in Week 5 and this is the week that the workouts vary each day.  This morning, after I tried killing myself with Jill’s workout, I did my longest intervals that I’ve done on the treadmill in a long time…8 minutes x 2!  My fit radio channel I listen to while I run is just not cutting it on intervals longer that 5 minutes.  SO, I watched The Mindy Project on my phone.  I’m not brave enough to use my ipad on my treadmill.  As many times as I yank my phone off the ledge and in drops on the running treadmill…???? 

Does anyone use one of those suction cup holder thingies for their ipad/phone while on the treadmill?

Eating

I decided it was time to buckle down on the eating plan and by buckle down, I mean, get precise.  After my recent loss of 7 pounds, I want to see the scale keep going down.  I knew I was eating healthy, but after the super bowl on Sunday, I starting doing more guessing than being accurate.  I don’t want to get into the habit of guessing and so using My Fitness Pal, I’m back at it making sure that I’m eating enough and not eating too much.  Right now, I’m shooting for my BMR of 1575. That should put me in the safe range to lose weight while still eating enough to support my workouts.  Right?  Input?

I leave you with….a healthy energy ball that, the more you stare at it, the more it will creep you out. At first it was just the eyes, then the little mouth….remind me to chops the dark chocolate chips up next time!

Recipe?  Not mine…go here: No-bake Energy Bites by gimme some oven

Day 10/24–Advocare Challenge–End of Cleanse Phase

Well wouldn’t you know it that the last day of the cleanse would fall on Superbowl Sunday?  I admit, I was a little terrified going into the day, knowing the amount of treats I would be surrounded by, but again, the day was a success.  And yeah, thanks to Advocare.  I swear, I’m sounding like a parrot here, but this stuff really works! I either don’t have cravings at all, or if I allow myself a treat, it’s just a bite, or a small amount and I don’t gorge myself like I used to.  Isn’t it a miserable feeling to be so stuffed that you hurt?  Because of how healthy I have been eating, later on my tummy really didn’t like the bites I had.  and I was fairly miserable.  Not from being too full though. To top it all off, we made some chocolate chip cookies that the dough had been purchased from a friend of my hubs…homemade dough…and shhh….don’t tell anyone, but the cookies were just not good.  Prior to Advocare, it wouldn’t have mattered to me.  A chocolate chip cookie is a chocolate chip cookie…fresh out of the oven even!  These were mheh.

All in all, through the cleanse phase of the challenge, I lost a total of 7 pounds.  That’s pretty incredible!

Here are some pictures of a few treats I had.  In addition to what you see here, I had one sip of beer, one sip of ginger ale, and two of those cookies that were bleck.  I guess I ate the second one hoping I had been wrong the first time?  I drank a ton of water during the day and had eaten a healthy breakfast and lunch as well as two servings of Spark.  Oh…and some homemade sweet potato chips that I roasted.  I was quite content and didn’t feel left out of the festivities at all.

Pretend that is a picture of the most delicious dip you have ever tried.  It really isn’t healthy but it is to die for.  It’s our version of the Deschutes's Brewery’s Cascade Ale Dip.  DB is one of our fave spots in Bend, Or.  Here’s the recipe…and I just realized that they changed the name of it to Twilight Summer Ale .Jalapeno Cheese Dip.

Stuffed mushrooms….stuffed with Italian sausage, cream cheese, spices…oh and there’s “some” butter in there too.

Our cat’s are not allowed on the furniture.  Just kidding!  She was about to shove me off the couch and take my spot….AND eat my dip.

Proof that I was parked on my butt for pretty much this reason only….

Days 8 & 9/24 Advocare Challenge

 

Day 8

Day 8 proved to me a little trickier than I would have liked.  I goofed up a bit on my food for the day and I blame it completely on sharks.  I seriously had chocolate calling my name and I gave in…not too horribly, but I caved.  I’ve had worse days where I would cuddle up to a small, Reeses PB cup blizzard and thankfully this wasn’t one of those days.  Progress?  You wanna know what I’m trying to give myself a hard time about?  2/3 of a Russell Stover’s milk chocolate candy bar and two squares of Hershey Bliss chocolate.  Not the end of the world.  The rest of the day was spot on though!

Day 9

Day 9 landed on a Saturday.  I dragged my butt out of bed to get in my last day of Week 4 on the Couch to 5k program I’m going through again.  By the time my workout was finished, I barely had enough time to race around and get myself packed up to be at a volleyball tourney the whole day.  I managed to race out the door without my phone, so I dropped the 13teen off to get warmed up and raced home.  Such a fun age!  I was on a high just from her excitement!  On my way out the door, I got a phone call with a plee for Dutch Bros blended raspberry green tea.  How can you say no?  What I did say no to for myself was a vanilla chai tea.  I tried telling myself I deserved it and that it wouldn’t hurt (And it probably wouldn’t have) but I wanted to save any spare calories for a sweet treat I had up my sleeve.  (Not literally though, wink wink.))

The tournament was exciting and stressful due to my competitive streak.  Yes, the kids need to have fun and that is the ultimate goal.  Right?  Still fun to win!   And win they did, until they had to go up against the A team in their Club.  My 13teen was skilled enough to be on the A team (not just mother pride talking) but God had something else in plan for her.  Now she gets to play every single second on the B team and she is so consistent, so talented, and just amazing.  She is loving all the play time she gets and boy did she give that A team a run for their money!  They almost beat them in the second game.  All the B team parents were on the edge of their seat.  All of those young ladies played their hearts out…such fun!

Oh I mentioned the VBall tourney mainly to explain why a couple of handfuls of mini pretzels found their way into my mouth.  Not all at once…can you imagine?!  Stress eating.  In recovery here!

The rest of the day was very productive…again, totally due to running in the morning, eating healthy and on a schedule (packed my snacks and salad) and taking my Advocare…especially the Spark!  I got home, cleaned the house, helped the hubs with paperwork, changed all the Scentsy pot smellies, helped my 15teen get ready for her winter formal, played taxi cab driver for a total of four teens, AND made that sweet treat that was up my sleeve.  I finally collapsed into bed with a sickie poo husband at 9pm.  I think he was as shocked as I was when he realized I was still awake at 10pm.

And now, I leave you with a few fun pictures.  I said fun, not necessarily GOOD pictures. lol!

I wanted you to see how tall she was compared to my 5’10”……She has ginormous electric blue platform heels on, by the way.

PS The lighting in our home stinks…and all our wall colors, while warm and homey, were not our choice of color.  It’s impossible to find a neutral background with any amount of lighting.  FYI.  Because I’m sure you were wondering.

Days 6 & 7/24 Advocare Challenge

Day 6

Day 6 was sure an opportunity for me to grow.  I had not gotten enough sleep the evening before and was determined to fix that.  It didn’t happen. I woke up at 3:37am and I’m pretty sure I didn’t go back to sleep when my alarm went off at 4:55am.  I hit snooze a couple of times and read some emails on my phone and got out of bed around 5:20.  Plenty of time to still get my run in!  I drank my spark and took my catalyst, but the thought of running put dread inside my tiny little brain.  I struggled with some emotions the rest of the morning while getting ready for work…mostly, I was convinced my day would be super duper bad and I would want to eat anything and everything that wasn’t healthy for me.  Then I put into practice a couple of teaching from church recently and from The Happiness Project….

(picture source)

You need to choose joy.  Yep, I was tired and didn’t get the sleep I wanted, but I still had a choice.  If I chose being crabby, then for sure, my day would stink big britches.

To feel energetic, you need to act energetic.  I’m not saying that I’m going to work out later, but if I keep telling myself, I’m soooo tired, I didn’t sleep well, I’m going to want to eat cruddy foods…..then again, that’s what I would end up doing.

Instead, and while a lot of it is a lie, my brain doesn’t know that…I le[t telling myself I feel great.  I’m doing great.  I’m a healthy eater.  I’m taking it one step at a time.  Sure, I was still tired, but changing my attitude did wonders.  If, at the very least, it it saved me from buying a large bag of Stacy’s pita chips, then the day has been a success!  I had a meeting to go to that forced me to miss my morning snack, and that made me very shaky by lunch, but after refueling, dare I say, there was a pep in my step?

I did successfully make it through the evening though it was pretty hard towards the end to not turn into the biggest McGrumpy Pants in town.  Thankfully, my family was spared from most all of it as I made myself go to bed at 7pm.   By then, I was in tears, because…well that’s what I do…I cry when I’m tired.  I also took some Hyland’s Calm Forte in an effort to keep me asleep the whole night.  Didn’t work completely.  I woke up a couple of times, BUT I went immediately back to sleep.

Day 7

Finally after a decent amount of sleep, I was able to wake up and get my workouts in!!  And not dread the day ahead.  Thursday, I went to another branch to do some training, and this time, I remembered to pack my snack.  Great idea!  I’m really loving that my hunger levels are staying pretty even keel today.  Back to what I’m quickly learning is the norm for taking Advocare products and sleeping well.

Little things that made me happy on Thursday:

A new phone battery to replace my seriously stupid one that wouldn’t recharge the whole way.

A second milk frother to keep at work….to froth my Spark drinks.  These things are amazing for stirring these drinks!   I have a Bodum one at home (Actually, it’s my hubs, and don’t tell him I’ve adopted it.)  The one I got is by: Cuissential at Amazon.  It’s not as nice as the Bodum one, but so far, it’s doing the trick.